tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post6132496573452694547..comments2023-06-26T08:53:10.213-07:00Comments on Mission Minded Mothering: The First Born ChildMyahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12393888329941524187noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post-41733246413888270162011-06-17T04:27:48.817-07:002011-06-17T04:27:48.817-07:00Thanks for sharing your story. Alex is going throu...Thanks for sharing your story. Alex is going through a lot of this, but his dynamic is so different being so much older than both his siblings and moving between 2 homes. I need to find some good step-parenting books! <br /><br />Regardless, it's nice to know others are going through the same thing.Andrea...Since 1978https://www.blogger.com/profile/00584317515949242432noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post-9628479827719489022011-06-16T11:04:07.291-07:002011-06-16T11:04:07.291-07:00yes, Jen... 1 day at a time, 1 day at a time. :) ...yes, Jen... 1 day at a time, 1 day at a time. :) THANK YOU for the encouragement!Myahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12393888329941524187noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post-46196391166200326182011-06-16T10:48:37.423-07:002011-06-16T10:48:37.423-07:00We are in the same place... Hard now that summer i...We are in the same place... Hard now that summer is here and they feel the need to lead kids who have been fine all year while she was in school! I am okay with the leader personality too, but there can be a fine line between being a leader and being bossy. I have found if I stay within ear shot I can interject to her at appropriate times before things escalate. (usually...) I point out that what is going on and ask her if she would like it is the roles were reversed, explain that not everyone wants to play exactly how she tells them, and that they are indeed okay without her instruction. I see it as not fair to the other kids if I let if go on, that it squashes their creativity and free play time. It's exhausting...but we're making respectful adults! One day at a time... -JenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post-52866462239481085922011-06-16T04:52:04.928-07:002011-06-16T04:52:04.928-07:00Steph, thank you for sharing! I have not read or ...Steph, thank you for sharing! I have not read or heard of that book. Thank you for recommending it - I will check it out. Actually, empathy works wonders with my children! I say a lot, "you seem frustrated" or "you seem upset, what's going on? can I help?" But, I believe Sophie wants me to FIX IT and not just help her out for a moment. I think I need to dig deeper with her and then give her the proper tools that will help get through situations when she's not in control and SHE can fix it. :) Again, thank you for the encouragement! It really helped!Myahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12393888329941524187noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4463778102994544817.post-42351653970126119162011-06-16T04:29:36.249-07:002011-06-16T04:29:36.249-07:00Hi Myah,
Sorry for these struggles! My "go ...Hi Myah,<br /><br />Sorry for these struggles! My "go to" for most behavior issues is empathy. I think, at least in adults, that need for control (not leadership, but control) stems from an underlying anxiety. I really believe there are "big" emotions motivating most children's behavior. Have you tried an empathetic discussion such as...<br /><br />"You really want them to follow your instruction right now. Are you feeling something bad will happen if they don't?"<br /><br />Have you read Discipline without Distress? I like it bc it gives specific examples for each age group. It helped immensely when my two yo hit the baby (while she was nursing!). I'm wondering if there might be any wisdom in it that could help. <br /><br />Blessings--<br />StephStephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08861405841666403932noreply@blogger.com